#porky fellow

[sahnejungsliebhaber]

Je mehr Torten er isst, desto sahniger wird dieser Bursche.

The more cakes he eats, the creamier he gets.

[h0neygh0ul]

Fem DafPork + Fem Bugs!!

Imma be honest this is just super self indulgent and that’s about it,,,

[ducktracy]

"Go See The Day the Earth Blew Up" Masterpost

this isn't really anything new for anyone following me, but i wanted to make a comprehensive post covering my adamence on seeing this movie--i have a lot of different versions of a lot of different posts being spread around, and wanted to uncross the wires a bit. entering Tumblr PSA mode for a bit like it's 2013 all over again--bear with me!

before getting into the nitty gritty, though, this is a TIME SENSITIVE POST. most theaters were beginning to pull the film out as early as end of day TODAY--not even a full WEEK'S worth of a run. but, thanks to word of mouth, the film has mostly been extended to the end of the weekend. with continued word of mouth and support, the film has a chance to run even longer.

What the Heck is The Day the Earth Blew Up

The Day the Earth Blew Up is an all traditionally hand-drawn, 2D animated film starring Looney Tunes' own Porky Pig, Daffy Duck and Petunia Pig. initially announced in September of 2021, it's the very first all traditionally animated film in the franchise's entire 95 year run.

Why Haven't I Heard About The Day the Earth Blew Up

originally intended to be a direct to streaming release, this film's existence has been wrung through the wringer. for the benefit of tax cuts, Warner Bros. wrote the film off and just barely avoided axing it entirely--even during its production. the film was put up for sale and only just last summer finally was able to procure an independent distributor, Ketchup Entertainment. unfortunately, Ketchup Entertainment is a much smaller name than Warner Bros. is, and because WB isn't releasing it, it's Ketchup who is marketing and spreading the film--obviously, something incredibly difficult to do with a very small budget.

Why the Heck Should I See The Day the Earth Blew Up

hand-drawn, traditionally animated films are all but extinct in theaters, and by setting the film up for what could essentially be described as sabotage, a meager box office performance is the perfect excuse for the suits to claim that there's no more demand for traditionally animated movies anymore.

it's the first all-animated Looney Tunes film in the entire franchise's history.

you don't have to have any knowledge or attachment to the characters to enjoy the film--there are absolutely no prerequisites required (but there are plenty of loving nods to fellow fans of the film.) i dragged my best friend to see this with me who doesn't have the same LT brain parasite that i do and she absolutely loved it.

WB just axed the entire LT library of shorts off of HBO Max, as well as gutted all of the cartoons freely available on their YouTube channel--there seems to be a clear embarrassment for the franchise on their behalf, and seeing the film proves that notion dead wrong.

supporting the film spreads the message that there is a demand for the love and craft that goes into these films. you will genuinely be experiencing history in the making--when's the last time you've seen a brand new, all traditionally animated film in the theaters from the States?

crew members themselves are urging you to spread your support and mention how it empowers them to keep making more

the money goes to Ketchup, not Zaslav--you don't have to worry about boycotting the film. the absolute opposite is necessary.

supporting this film could potentially spawn similar films with similar opportunities. Eric Bauza himself has mentioned that suport and turnout for this film could see a potential revival in Coyote vs. ACME, another film victim to WB's tax writeoffs all in the name of the dollar

EDIT: Ketchup Entertainment is in talks with WB to distribute Coyote vs ACME!!! because of the word of mouth and positivist surrounding The Day the Earth Blew Up!! keep it coming!!

it's likely that the film will be completely overshadowed by the Snow White remake, with theaters initially beginning to pull screens to make way for early previews. what could be more poetic than supporting an all traditionally hand-drawn film over a cash-grab remake of the very first feature length traditionally hand-drawn film?

How Else Can I Support The Day the Earth Blew Up

GO SEE IT! go see it again! go see it with your siblings, your friends, your family! tell your coworkers! reblog this post! spread the news! keep the conversation going!

pre-orders for the Blu-ray, releasing May 27th, are already scheduled

there's a limited edition run of 1,000 copies for the film's soundtrack on vinyl!

said soundtrack is also available on YouTube, which you should likewise listen to! get those view counts up!

Why the Heck Should I Listen to You

i'm asking myself the same thing! but, i do want to put this out there: i get it. i usually do not like being a walking advertisement. i know this is full on shill-mode and you're surely asking "you're being paid, aren't you" (i wish!). i also share the Ferocious Contrarian Gene where seeing posts like these is an instant way for me to NOT want to see the film. i genuinely understand how pushy and obnoxious this can come off. especially since, clearly, i'm a little biased to the franchise and these characters. i also balk at the guilt trippy idea of "YOU'RE A MONSTER IF YOU DON'T SUPPORT THIS FILM YOU KILLED ANIMATION". i HATE that rhetoric with a passion, and that only is going to alienate people from wanting to see this further. please know that's not the intent of my messaging here at all.

but even beyond my personal biases, i really think this is a film worth supporting. movies like this are a once-in-a-lifetime event anymore, and that could only be exacerbated by how this film's fate is handled. i've been overjoyed with the amount of messages i've received from people who said they caught the film on a whim and enjoyed it--especially from those without a clear LT bias like myself. it's proven that this film is enjoyable for anyone.

also, just, spite. the reason you haven't heard about it is by design. this film has been set up to fail. and while the success shouldn't be the sole responsibility or burden of the consumers, but instead the higher-ups, you are making a difference by supporting and spreading word of mouth of this film. crew members themselves are saying so. the distributor themselves are saying so.

i'm not expecting a miracle for this film, as much as i'd love one. i will genuinely be surprised if it makes a profit (which it should at a measly $15 million, pennies compared to most features that look much worse than this). but that's all the more reason to TRY rather than give up and say there's nothing we can do. you all have been making such a wonderful difference. that energy needs to continue, not dwindle. every single person is able to make a difference.

there are a lot worse ways you could be spending your time than spending an hour and a half at the theaters enjoying some gorgeous traditionally hand-drawn animation on the big-screen, feeling good that you're helping to spread a message and supporting the hard, loving craft of the people who worked on it. imagine if all "good turn"s in the world could be as fun and easy as seeing an animated comedy!

[stilldoingscience]

you are so correct for being a razia's shadow fan AND a mother fan.

i actually have an entire toba the tura animatic planned out. its between the dark dragon and porky after m3. maybe u will get to see that over the summer at some point 🙏

listen this message is amazing and 🫡 I’m pretty sure I’ve seen you in the dear hunter tag.. so as a fellow mother, razias shadow, and TDH fan I’m very excited to see anything made! toba the turas such a great song for them

[twothpaste]

some PSI headcanons

Ness' PSI developed from a very young age, but never grew powerful enough to do anything particularly impressive 'til he went on his journey. A little bit of clumsy wimpy telekinesis, usually dropping stuff in the process. Mending small cuts & scrapes. Talkin' to dogs. Nothing too flashy, almost mundane even. His efforts to practice or show off usually ended in goofish blunders, or incredulity from others. While his best bud Porky flip-flopped between jealousy and dismissal. So Ness grew up feeling sort of insecure about his abilities. Meeting Paula & Poo was kind of a game changer for him, realizing he really wasn't a lone psychic weirdo.

Paula was well-known for her PSI in Twoson. Practically Ness' opposite, she was a natural child prodigy. Loved to show off her abilities like party tricks, much to the delight and amazement of her community. Her mother encouraged it, kinda parading her around (vicariously soaking up the praise & awe). She's never been ashamed of her powers, but did grow to feel misunderstood & a little taken advantage of when she realized most folks (her mother included) just saw them as a novelty. Her visions of Ness are actually a rare precognitive ability. However, Paula can't exactly provoke visions on command, and can't tell whether or not the futures she sees are set in stone. Since she's got so much proud finesse over her offensive PSI, having little control over her precognition actually frustrates her to no end. Meeting Ness & Poo humbles her, and comes as a huge relief when she finally has fellow psychics in her life who really get it.

Poo's trained with fellow psychics all his life, but was taught only to use his powers under formal discipline. When he meets a little fat kid who telekinetically juggles chicken wings, and a snarky girl who uses PK Thunder for static electricity pranks, he's kind of blown away. The freedom granted by using his powers loosely & Teleporting around the globe cannot be understated. Dude lowkey develops a bit of a rebellious streak, finding crafty ways to employ PSI for fun. He can definitely read minds, which probably unnerves his friends at first. I like to imagine he can't learn PK Fire 'cause it embodies a sort of brazen fury that just isn't present in Poo's character - whereas Thunder and Freeze are more focused and composed.

Lucas n' Claus had latent psychic abilities from birth - but contrasted with Ness' flashback where he was using telekinesis as a baby, I get the impression they were comparatively late bloomers. Maybe due to their hometown upbringing; Tazmily's defined at its core by such a profoundly repressed peace, after all… They could communicate with animals, and assumed everyone else could too (adults lackadaisically humored their babbles about whatever Boney was sayin'). They had a strong telepathic link with each other, and assumed that was just a normal twin thing. It's interesting how trauma, urgency, and an implied survival instinct is what "awakens" their true potential. I could probably make a whole post about that alone, oh no, I'll go on instead.

Since he didn't grow up actively using PSI, Lucas tends to forget he has it, and often overlooks or forgoes its practical applications. He rarely uses telekinesis, he cleans & bandages wounds before recalling he can use Lifeup, he doesn't often consciously employ his empathic abilities. Said empathic abilities are extremely potent, though. Kid picks up on everybody's feelings all the time, and can never quite tell if it's a psychic thing or his anxiety or just his natural compassion for others. He can't actually read the minds of strangers though - the mere possibility is deeply unnerving to him. He can passively hear Claus' thoughts (or ominous lack thereof 😶). And he's at least sorta sensitive to the thoughts of other folks he's grown dearly close to (Kuma, Duster, Flint post-reconciliation, etc).

The Masked Man's powerful PSI is all just tightly-channeled fear and rage and love and despair, so warped beyond recognition that neither he nor his handlers can correctly identify it. Fassad trained him through dubiously brutal methods, forcing him to inflict pain, conditioning his subconscious mind to relish what little power it could wield over its surroundings. My post-canon Claus goes through a long phase where he swears off PSI, afraid of its potential, convinced he doesn't deserve it. Only for it to re-emerge from his fingertips anyways in moments of stress or concern (oops, sorry little dude, it is a fundamental part of who you are). Once Lucas n' Kuma show him how to use it in a healthy way, Claus does a 180, eager to reclaim it. He's got all of the same abilities as Lucas (including Lifeup & Shields, which'd been thoroughly repressed along with the rest of his compassion, before). His empathic capacity is literally the same too - but since Claus ain't nearly as emotionally intelligent as his brother, and his head's usually rattling with his own mess of feelings, he can't often make much sense of other peoples'. It kinda just forms a layer of background noise, which he tends to tune out. As his disabilities progress with age, he grows more comfortable relying on telekinesis.

Kumatora's such a natural psychic, she was literally having telekinetic fire-breathing tantrums as an infant. Which is the main reason why the Tazmilians passed her onto the Magifolk, knowing they'd be able to raise her better than a bunch o' amnesiac bumpkins ever could. Though not exactly structured or formal, her training was baked into her upbringing. Thus, PSI's baked into her everyday lifestyle. It's hard for Kuma not to use her powers casually, to fetch writing utensils from across the room, or heat her tea with PK Fire, or overhear your thoughts and respond to them aloud. (Probably a hilarious challenge when she was posing as Violet). She was the only human psychic she'd ever known, right up until Lucas rolled up packing new powers he was mildly to severely frightened of. It's only thanks to Kuma that he learned how to handle himself with care and confidence. And only thanks to Kuma that the postgame world's got any proper knowledge about PSI. I like to imagine she offers tutelage to any new psychics that may emerge. The one person who's left to bear PSI's history and proper training methods, carrying on a tradition passed down by her guardians…

I headcanon all psychics have telekinesis, but some are better or worse at it than others. And they all have some degree of telepathy, though very few are focused & skilled enough to straight up read minds. Communicating with animals falls somewhere relatively low along the same scale. They can learn techniques from each other (a la the adorable explanation given for Ness & Lucas' Smash Bros movesets) - but it takes a long period of dedicated one-on-one teaching, hence why we don't see it happen during the fast-paced storylines of the Mother games. Though PSI is very uncommon, it isn't really hereditary, and can manifest in literally any rando. But it does appear more often in some locations / populations than others (ie. Dalaam as a place of longstanding psionic spiritual traditions, Nowhere as a blessed place sitting atop a draconic embodiment of the Earth's power, you get the idea 🤷‍♂️). I like to portray it more as a cerebral brain power than a 1-to-1 with fantasy magic. It does have a wishy-washy hippie sorta vibe to it though. Something that comes from a connection to Mother Earth, a way to channel emotions and love and the gift of life itself.

(I personally find M1's explanation for PSI's origin incompatible with the other two games, which both present a much more grounded, ancient, and Earthly take on it. Which is fine, since M2 plays out more like a reboot than a sequel anyways. But in an earnest effort to try and connect the threads, maybe PSI is simply a kind of power that exists within every planet? Thus, when George "steals" the secrets of PSI, he's learning how humans can unlock the powers granted by the Earth, the same way aliens presumably unlocked the powers of their homeworlds?? Who knows.)

[maxslibrary]

Could you do some headcanons of the Looney tunes meeting a gen z reader? idk maybe its one of the Looney tunes extended family and they just decided to take the reader with Them (bc why not) and the other Looney tunes is confused because they don’t what the actual fuck the reader is saying bc of gen z slang?

[Gen Z Reader x Looney Tunes Gang Scenarios]

(Oh god I'm gonna love writing this. I decided to go with the main gang! Hope you don't mind!)

🐰Bugs Bunny🐰

You let the word "BASED!" slip in front of him.

"Based on..what?"

He said, literally not knowing what the heck you were saying. After a bit of laughter you begin to explain it to him.

"Oh! Yeah.. Based. Based."

He kind of like, trails off when he says that because he's still genuinely confused.

I imagine he typically sticks to the slang he's used to, however there's been a few times where he's tried to use modern slang.. it typically does not go well but at least he falls with grace.

🦆Daffy Duck🦆

When you first let the slang slip Daffy is absolutely confused. He's unsure of what you just said and more importantly: did you just insult him?

"Whatda mean "Cringefail?????""

bro is flabbergasted. You explain it to him and he's even more confused. But then you say it's modern lingo and he nods.

He starts using modern terms and it's BAD.

He throws around "Based" and "Cringefail" like NOBODIES business. He thinks he's hot shit now. (VERRYYY "how do you do fellow kids")

Eventually he has to be told that he was NOT pulling it off and he hesitantly stopped.

🐽Porky Pig🐽

Porky was trying to bake something. Nothing more, nothing less. Then you suddenly call him "A malewife".

"W-W-Whatsa..W-Whatsa m-m-malewife?"

You assure him, it's not a negative thing! After you explain he takes it sort of like a complement. He still doesn't fully understand but hey! He's a Malewife I guess!

He'll go up to the others and be like "Y-Ya know! Y/N called me a male wife and I-I-I think that's pretty n-n-n-nea-n-ne..swell!"

He doesn't use any terms himself BUT he does try and ask for you to explain some of them to him.

🚩Marvin The Martian🚩

INSTANTLY after you say the word Marvin is confused to hell in back. What EARTHLING dialect WAS THIS?

"Earthling what on MARS is a BOGOS BINTED???"

You explain to him that it's an internet joke and he's even MORE confused. He paces around trying to think of what exactly to say.

You show him the video and he just kind of stares for a second before squinting at you.

"... Is that EARTH humor?"

You confirm that it is yes. Earth humor.

"Weird."

He then proceeds to walk away, before chuckling to himself.

🧨Wile E Coyote🧨

Wile overhears what you say and puts a hand to his chest.

"My word what.. what WAS that?"

Rinse and repeat, you explain to him and he is utterly baffled.

"Ah this is the modern dialect of the youth. I understand"

He proceeds to talk about how he feels older dialect is much less "Timeless" and such. But he humors you.

He does little laughs whenever you use the terms. You can't tell if it's out of genuine fondness or it's meant to mock you.

"Ah yes. Swag. What a word."

Yeah you literally cannot tell.

Road Runner Dabs.

[ask-the-fever-four]

Did Lucas ever meet that porky fellow?

Well... yeah. Not in a good way, though.

I actually feel bad for Lucas and Claus. You saw their reactions to him back then yourself.

Yeah...

[hellsite-yano]

really enjoying the minecraft posts, porky, they're a warm and cozy little moment in my day. I go "I wonder what that chucklesome pig fellow is up to" and open your tumblr. and there's a post like "this big dickhead mountain has too much Not My House in it!!!" and I sip my coffee and go "yea" and feel a little bit better for the rest of the day. glad you're having fun.

[ethanhuntfemmefatale]

who’s your fav composer

Hey!!! :)) that’s such a good question!!! and very tricky. I have a lot of composers that are close to my heart—probably the most notable ones are Brahms, Tchaikovsky, Prokofiev, and Shostakovich. (Tchaik, Porky, Shosty.) Brahms and Tchaik for me are personal composers because of my Queer Brahms Thesis and Tchaik being one of the first “figures” anyone ever talked to me about being gay…I remember when my mom told me that Tchaikovsky loved men, I was playing his violin concerto and it stuck with me hard. Both of them have some of the most beautiful melodies I’ve ever heard, shout-out to the one moment in Tchaik concerto first movement where the violin plays the first theme soft and delicate and arpeggiated like a dance. Holy shit. And the second theme of Brahms concerto first movement hurts my heart, it’s unspeakably beautiful. My Queer Brahms Thesis actually started before I had any real evidence for it, simply based off of his melodies—I was certain as a queer kid that nobody but a queer person could write melodies like that. Also (getting even more into the weeds) there’s such a fascinating focus on the subdominant in Brahms’ music (feminine, unexpected, beautiful), over the more classic dominant of Beethoven and such. I have other evidence for the Queer Brahms Thesis now that I know more about his life but it all started with my love of his music

Shosty and Porky are composers that I grew into loving. The Shostakovich violin concerto no1 has long been essentially my favorite piece of music of all time, particularly the third movement and the cadenza, the third movement is this dark sad hopeful song over the terrifying overwhelming repetitive bass, and the cadenza is a masterpiece of growing so gradually from this slow barely-there thing to something that is huge and angry and screaming. I played the Prokofiev second violin sonata growing up and fell deeply in love with it, it’s another one of my favorite pieces, and I was working on his second violin concerto at a really difficult time in my life, and it was one of the most important and cathartic parts of my relationship with music and with myself at the time. I love the way that Shosty and Porky’s music deals with anger and ugliness, the way that it doesn’t shy away from horror, it doesn’t prioritize aesthetic over all. And their music understands that beauty can also be horrifying and ugly, and angry, and that makes it more beautiful.

Gonna stop there cause I could rant about this stuff for a long long long time. Thank you so much for the ask fellow musician <3 :)))))

[bowsnbots]

// Inserts a Torment Nexus Star ⭐ into the inbox -

Bashing Our Muses Together Like Action Figures [Accepting!]

Hmm. If I am truly being honest, I think Omino needs to visit the Torment Nexus. He loves his best friend, The Vigilante, who runs the Torment Nexus now that Fake Noise is out of a job. I do think Omino loves the Torment Nexus so much that his friends, like Mimi and Papeeno, should come see how The Vigilante treats his good friend Omino and maybe, as thanks, Papeeno can force feed offer this cheeseslime one of his famous Best-a Pizza Town-A and kill him instantly—

This was already established on the other side, but I do think Mega Man should meet Gwen! Frankly, I think he'd have fun meeting any of the gunners, including Mimi. Tough-as-nails person with an arm cannon is not new territory for the bot, and frankly, I think he'd geek out a little interacting with one of them, probably more-so Gwen, since she's the friendlier of the ones I know. Plus she's dating Jae, who's Dr. Light's daughter, I'm told, so they're basically family! I think he'd probably have a lot of technical questions that I'm... not even sure they'd be able to answer. They can direct him to Guest F. He'll kill her probably.

...Actually, if Guest F met Porky, do you think the world would explode—

I'm seconding that Cream and Mimi would make for funny friends. I never would've considered it myself, despite Mimi reminding me a little of IDW Gemerl (Cream's protector), but it's genius. You know the "I'm not afraid of you" thing that was going around a few years back? Like that, but it ends in friendship. Like if Cheese had a really strong gun. Frankly, I've thought about putting Gemerl back on the multi, and I think they'd eventually get along, too. The only thing stopping me is that I'd have to read IDW.

I'm going through the muse list, glancing over characters I missed a lot of during my absence, or characters I caught glimpses of but don't have the full picture for, and first impressions are that this Guest A fellow reminds me just enough of Doctor Light that I think they should talk about cargo shorts together, or whatever it is dads talk about in their free time. And, you know, maybe the creating a new kind of entity thing, but the cargo shorts thing is pretty important, we should probably get that out of the way first. I may be missing the mark entirely here, but the mental image was funny enough that I figured I should put it down.

[commandernachos]

idk what im doing out here but haiiii fellow porky fan. you GET it. godspeed may your crops be watered and the harvest bountiful 🫡

Thank you, you too fellow Porky fan 😌

If you haven't already, check out @eegasleega-will-change-this-l8r because she has GREAT characater analysis of him

[ducktracy]

here is a smattering of some of my favorite animation anecdotes concerning the WB guys—will probably add onto this last as i remember and discover more, but the public deserves to hear them:

Corny Cole told Chuck Jones that he can "take your Daffy Duck and you can ram him up your asshole" after Jones was dissatisfied with Cole's storyboard pitch for a cartoon because it was not "my Daffy Duck".

Tedd Pierce got his ear bitten by someone's pet monkey at a bar and required both bandages and shots

the writers had to slip fake drawings of Porky in a storyboard pitch for an unrelated cartoon to trick Leon Schlesinger into giving his approval because he would be largely apathetic otherwise

Rod Scribner famously hated Art Davis and decided to play a prank on him by tipping a phone booth he was in 45 degrees, prompting Davis to fall, which then prompts Scribner to tip it back up and run away laughing

additionally, Scribner and Bill Melendez would tip bookcases over and drop loud objects on the floor to distract the Freleng and Jones unit animators below them and, in Melendez's words, "Friz's guys were great because they would fight back"

cameraman Smokey Garner asked to be paid in cash because he feared the feds would get him if they had his information via check--he was eventually talked into receiving checks... until the feds visited him a few weeks later for something else unrelated

animator Tom Ray once got so mad that he opened a window to let some fresh air in, but the glass shattered, completely desecrated his arm and he had to be rushed to the hospital by fellow animator Art Leonardi

the studio often held yearly square dances, and Chuck Jones in particular was a huge square dance junkie; Hillbilly Hare owes its existence to these square dances

lighting film nitrates, if wound tight enough, would prompt them to smolder but not combust; the studio once had to be evacuated and the fire department called because of said self-made smoke bomb

Corny Cole and Willie Ito once got so drunk at a lunch together that Ito ended up vomiting all over Chuck Jones’ office

[koopzilla]

Bowser, have you met any of the antagonists of your fellow Smash competitors? Specifically the ones who didn't get an invite. (Porky Minch, Andross, Magolor, etc).

"I punched Bayonetta's Dad."

[twothpaste]

Paula for the ask game, if you'd like!

First impression:

wow they sure made the girl character a pink little damsel (despite her badass powers) and called it a day huh. ok

Impression now:

wow i can take the girl character and develop whatever i want about her and -- oh shit - oops - haha whoops - now she's my favorite

Favorite moment: Every time she uses PK Freeze. But really, I'm very sentimental about the brief period between Twoson and Threed where it's just Ness and Paula traveling together. Paula makes a friend she can be herself with. Ness makes a friend after braving the big scary world all by himself. They're probably a little awkward and uncertain of each other at first, but they quickly come to admire each others' strengths!! Combat feels so fresh and exciting once you finally have a party member! They both have to learn to work together with a fellow PSI user, and it's really sweet.

Idea for a story: I don't really have more Paula stories on the brain rn. Whatever I do next with Intermission AU though, I wanna develop her friendship with Claus some more… They're both book-smart and snarky, he's one of very few people who can keep up with her wit. She only knows the half of what he's been through, but she looks out for him on the downlow. Especially in light of his bad experiences with Porky (Paula helped Ness through his fallout with Porky too, she's kind of in a unique position to provide some levelheaded advice & support). And they've both got unresolved anger with their family members. Their playfully pretentious nerd banter might easily give way to some heartfelt & heavy discussions. I feel like one of these days I could cook up somethin interesting. Intermission Senior Year arc where Paula finally stands up to her megalomaniac mom, while Claus cheers from the sidewalk like "yeah paula, you tell her!! yolo, dude! i got your back!"

Unpopular opinion: A lot of fan content I see & read will either sideline her or just, not flesh her out very much beyond Yeah She Sure Is The Girl. :( Itoi left the EarthBound party members relatively underdeveloped on purpose, hoping players would fill in the blanks to their hearts' content. Paula can be anything or anyone, and can have really interesting dynamics with her other party members! I just think her potential is often underutilized.

Favorite relationship: She's Ness' best friend!! A smart pretty popular girl befriends a little fat boy with average grades n' no connections beyond his hometown! And against all expectations, it turns out they get along brilliantly! He helps her loosen up & let go of her perfectionism, she helps him overcome his insecurities & become a more confident person! Ness really really needed someone to trust as his friendship with Porky crumbled, and Paula was right there the whole time. I think they have lots of silly goofy fun together - they'll dance and do karaoke and take joke photos at national monuments. I have a funny little headcanon that they tried dating in high school, quickly realized they like just being friends much better, and went on as if nothing happened. And another, that they teach each other their PSI techniques. Healing doesn't come naturally to Paula, and offense doesn't come naturally to Ness, but they're patient and perseverant and they figure it out over time.

Favorite headcanon: My girl Paula is academia pilled to comedic degrees. She's obsessed with Virginia Woolf. She feels a spiritual kinship with The Queen's Gambit. She daydreams about being a college professor. When she watches movies she calls them "films," and you'd better believe she's taking notes.

[gayadvicefairy]

For anyone not in the know,

Officer Porky originally claimed he swerved to avoid a dog. The lawyers for the gays who own the bar released surveillance footage of the incident featuring - you guessed it - zero dogs. Then Lt. Krispy Kreme claimed to have swerved to avoid a (stationary) car.

Upon slamming his tax-funded tank into a business, the pig proceeded to berate the owners who had come outside and demanded to see their IDs.

Fun fact: NO TOXICOLOGY SCREEN WAS PERFORMED ON THE OFFICER INVOLVED IN THE "ACCIDENT" BECAUSE A FELLOW OFFICER SAID HE LOOKED FINE

St. Louis cops are the dumbest animals on earth. They're like lord of the rings orcs, you could throw a rock into a crowd of them and they'd all start beating the shit out of each other.

[hxroic-wxlls-fxrever]

"Umm... Pardon me, you're "Super Mario", correct? Sooo... I have this new movie playing in theaters called The Day the Earth Blew Up starring Yours Truly & Porky Pig... And I was wondering... From one beloved mascot to another... Think you & bro can help spread the good word about it so more people can see it? The folks over at Warner Bros barely did anything to help advertise it... So if you can... Thanks!"

(Daffy Duck to Mario & Luigi)

“ Oh, no problem’o, paisano! Bro and I would be more than happy to help out with that. Trust me, we know how hard it is when some stuff just can’t get out there, unless matters are taken into your-a own hands. You can count on us to inform! “

After all, he’d never want to see a fellow mascot fail while pursuing such an honest passion and goal.